Increase your INFLUENCE by making this one change
Our clients’ main goal is not to improve their English. Their goal is to increase their influence, by improving their English. It’s a big difference.
Influence is an important currency in our world, and even more so in our business world. We are all vying for influence in one way or another, and to varying degrees. We strive to influence conversations; we endeavour to influence decisions; we want to influence people.
Arguably, the ability to influence is a skill, and our level of influence is dependent on our level of competence. But here’s the catch: our level of competence is based on the perception of others.
How others perceive us, dictates whether or not they can be influenced by us. If they perceive us as highly competent, we can more likely convince or persuade. On the other hand, however, if they perceive us to be low in competence, they are less likely to be swayed.
| Rather than seek to influence, seek to increase perception of competence.
So the question then becomes – how can I change how others perceive me? Or better still, how can I change how they perceive my competence?
| To increase their perception of competence and thus your influence, reduce your hedging.
What is hedging?
Hedging language is cautious, vague or ambiguous language. It is language that avoids certainty, is indirect and evasive. It is a linguistic device that may portray lack of clarity or indecisiveness. Crucially, to others, it may be perceived as being unsure, hesitant, unknowing. Consider these examples:
I would say…
I think…
Kind of…
May be…
Could…
Possible…
Typically…
Probably
How often do you use these expressions, or others similar? While all of these examples are great in certain circumstances, when we want to increase our perceived competence, we want to portray our certainty and assertiveness, and these hedged language tools do the opposite. Consider the alternatives:
Is hedging bad?
Now don’t get me wrong – hedging itself is not a bad thing. In fact, it can be great! It can be used strategically to avoid giving a definitive answer, to soften your language or be more polite. Though, when it comes to increasing perceived competence, hedging is a no no.
Over to you
Now, it’s you’re your turn. Consider your second language (or even your mother tongue )and how you speak. Do you hedge frequently? Do you avoid being definitive with your answers? How do you think your speech is perceived? What does your language portray? Be honest with yourself. Do you convey uncertainty and playing safe? Or do you convey confidence, clarity and authority?
If authority and influence are one of your goals, tweaks and changes may be required… no wait… tweaks and changes are required.
Try this exercise
Next time you are in your car or out for a walk alone, ask yourself some questions and answer in English. Observe your linguistic tendencies. Are you hedging a lot? What hedging words to you tend to use a lot? What simple changes could you make? What one change could you make today?